BREAKING....................BUNTY REPORTED TO BE DISSAPOINTED THAT SHE WAS NOT CHOSEN AS TORCH BEARER ................

DE VELOPING............CHAS TO REMAIN SUSPENDED,

BREAKING..............ANDY NOT TOO WELL

WE ARE HEARING TONIGHT ANDY IS NOT FEELING TOO WELL AND LAID UP IN BED WITH MAN FLU HE SAYS...APPARANLEY NURSE BETTY IS ON 24 HR CALL AS DAY & NIGHT NURSE.........DEAR O DEAR

LATEST.......ANDY CAUSES TRAFFIC CHAOS

ANDY THE LOLLIPOP MAN WHO STARTED HIS JOB TODAY HAS CAUSED COMPLETE ROAD CHAOS FOR DRIVERS, PEDESTRIANS AND OTHERS TOO EVEN CHILDREN WERE LATE FOR SCHOOL.REPORTS OF A 30 MILE TRAFFIC JAM WHILST HE ALLOWED PEDESTRIANS TO USE THE CROSSINGS. HE ALSO MADE PEOPLE QUEUE AT THE CROSSINGS AND ON HIS LOLLIPOP SIGN HE HELD UP TO TRAFFIC IT SAID ...STOP BANGER...DEAR O DEAR EVENTUALLY POLICE WERE CSLLED TO HELP EASE THE JAMS...... ALSO CHILDREN WERE SCARED OF SEEING A LOLLIPOP MAN WITH A PIPE........

MORE.........

YES YOU HEARD RIGHT ANDY THE LOLLIPOP MAN, HE NOW CLAIMS THE HIGHWAY AGENCY HAVE APPROACHED HIM TO PATROL AND CONTROL TRAFFIC OUTSIDE SCHOOLS TO HELP THE MORNING RUSH AND REDUCE CONJESTION AND ROAD PROBLEMS.AND HE SAYS HE STARTS TOMORROW.....DEAR O DEAR

BREAKING.......ANDY TO BE LOLLIPOP MAN???????

UPDATE..........

CHAS THE SAT SUPREME CARETAKER HAS REPORTEDLY TOLD THE RADIO VERULAM MANAGEMENT TONIGHT THAT HE WAS NOT WITH VERA DURING HIS ABSENCE AND THAT HE WAS AWAY FOR PERSONAL REASONS. WHEN ASKED WHY WAS HE SEEN WITH VERA HE SAID I WAS JUST CARRYING HER HOOVER FOR HER......DEAR O DEAR