Thursday 30 January 2014

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BUNTY SAYS SHE HAS WOKEN UP MANY TIMES THIS WEEK DREAMING OF LEN JONES. I HAVE BEEN REGULARLY WAKING UP AND SHOUTING FOR LE0NARD. THE DREAMS ARE GETTING MORE VIVID SHE SAYS I FEEL LIKE HIS BESIDE ME EVERY NIGHT AS I PUFF AWAY......................

BREAKING..............................BUNTY CALLS OUT OUT FOR LEONARD IN HER SLEEP??????


BREAKING........................BERTY BIG TEETH GIVES THEM A GOOD BRUSH?????.


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THE CIGAR QUEEN, HERSELF TO CELEBRATE THE CHINESE NEW YEAR WILL BE INVITING EVERYONE TO JOIN HER IN LIGHTING UP TO SEE THE CHINESE YEAR IN WITH A CIGAR,,. THERES ONLY ONE WAY TO CELEBRATE  AND THATS IN TRUE CIGAR STYLE SHE SAID......................................

BREAKING...........................BUNTY TO HAVE CHINESE CIGAR WEEKEND????

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ITS CHINESE NEW YEAR SOON, AND BANGER IS TURNING CHINESE WE HEAR HES SELLING HIS OWN BRAND OF NOODLES YET AGAIN, AND TALKING TO THE PUBLIC OF ST ALBANS IN CHINESE OR TRYING TO ANYWAY.......................

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THE WAR OF WORDS BETWEEN BRUISER AND WHITE VAN MAN CONTINUES TO HOT UP WITH THE WORDS GETTING MORE FURIOUS. BANGER TELLS US WHITE VAN MAN WILL BE SORRY HES MET BRUISER...........................

Wednesday 29 January 2014

Tuesday 28 January 2014

Monday 27 January 2014

Thursday 23 January 2014

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CHAS SEEMS TO HAVE MADE THE HEADLINES  HIMSELF THIS WEEK  IN THE CITY TIMES. AS YOU MAY HAVE HEARD CHAS HAS RECENTLY  SUCCEEDED THE POSITION OF A PAPER  BOY WAS SURPRISED TO READ ABOUT HIMSELF ON THE FRONT SAYING.........  PAPER BOY IN LOVE WITH STATION CLEANER.................WELL!!!!!



BREAKING.......................CHAS MAKES THE HEADLINES????


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WHITE VAN MAN HAS TOLD US THAT HES VAN HAS GONE MISSING AND BELIEVE EITHER BANGER OR BRUISER ARE THE CULPRITS.......HE VOWED TO GET REVENGE  SAYING THEY WILL GO MISSING WHEN I FIND THEM......................




BREAKING...................... REPORTS .........WHITE VAN MANS VAN GOES MISSING?????

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ANDY SAYS THE PUBLIC EVERYWHERE LOVE HIM AND HAVE BEEN SENDING HIM MESSAGES SAYING JUST THAT AS SEEN BELOW......................



BREAKING.................................IT SEEMS EVERYONE LOVES ANDY??????

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BUNTY SAYS SHE HAS BEEN DREAMING ABOUT LEN JONES AGAIN, SHE  SAYS I AWAKE REGULARLY IN THE NIGHT IN A SWEAT HAVING DREAMT ABOUT ME AND LEONARD, IM CONVINCED ITS A PREMONITION ONE DAY WE WILL BE TOGETHER SHE SAYS ITS WRITTEN IN THE STARS I LOVE A BIG BAND AND HE WILL LOVE A BIG CIGAR .....................UNTIL TONIGHT LEONARD ILL SEE YOU IN MY DREAMS.............................................




LOVE BUNTYXXXXX

BREAKING....................BUN TY HAVING DREAMS OF MR JONES AGAIN??????

MORE.......................ARE YOU AN ANDY????

ANDY SAYS THERE SHOULD BE MORE ANDYS THAT COME OUT AND REVEAL THEMSELVES THERES PLENTY OF US OUT THERE SO REVEAL YOURSELVES AND BE PROUD TO BE AN ANDY.........................





BREAKING.....................ALL OUT ANDY????

MORE........................OH DEAR BUNTY NOW HAS RAMBO AT IT!!!!!





YES BUNTY HAS NOW GOT RAMBO HOOKED HES STARTED CIGAR SMOKING IN HIS OWN CIGAR CAR. WELL IT WAS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME.....................

BREAKING...................THE BUNTY CIGAR CAR??????

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EL B HAS CALLED ON BIKERS TO UNITE AGAINST ANTI BIKER TALK ON THE ROADS. ITS TIME WE ALL GOT TOGETHER AND SHOWED THEM ALL WHAT WE ARE MADE OF HE SAYS................

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BANGER IS ALREADY IN TROUBLE FOR REPAIRING OR SHOULD WE NOT REPAIRING  A BRIDGE . WE HEAR THAT THE LOCAL COUNCIL  WHO HIRED HIM ARE NOW TAKING HIM TO COURT, BANGER SAYS DONT BLAME HIM.....................

BREAKING...........EL B SAYS BIKERS UNITE?????

BREAKING..........BANGERS BRIDGE REPAIRS???

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WE HEAR THAT BERTY BIG TEETH WENT FOR A DENTAL CHECK UP AND HE WAS TOLD THAT HIS TEETH HAVE GROWN EVEN MORE. ......

Tuesday 21 January 2014

BREAKING..................BERTY BIG TEETH, GOES FOR CHECK UP?????

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YES THIS ONE LOOKS LIKE IT COULD SPREAD, ITS BANGERS OWN BRAND OF BUTTER. WELL LETS NOT BUTTER HIM UP TOO MUCH ON THIS ONE BUT WE HEAR THAT HES REALLY EXCITED ABOUT BANGERS BUTTER, HE SAYS IT WILL TASTE LIKE NOTHING EVER BEFORE WE WILL SEE........................

BREAKING...................BUTTERED UP BANGER????


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BUNTYS BIG CIGAR JOB?? YES BUNTY SAYS SHE HAS PLANS FOR A BIG CIGAR JOB IN 2014. WE ASKED WHAT SHE MEANT BY THIS AND WELL I INTEND TO GROW LOTS OF CIGARS IN MY ALLOTMENT AND SPREAD THE WORD FURTHER AROUND THE GLOBE IN HER QUEST TO MAKE CIGARS A WORLD EVERYDAY LUXURY...........................

BREAKING.....................BUNTYS BCB ??????


Thursday 16 January 2014

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BUNTY SAYS SHE BEEN HAVING SOME DREAMS ABOUT VERULAMS BIG BAND/JAZZ PRESENTER LEN JONES.  I OFTEN WAKE UP IN A SMOKE OVER HAVING SOME INTENSE AND WHAT I HOPE ARE PREMONITIONS OF LEONARD AND I HAVING AN EXCITING FUTURE TOGETHER I BELIEVE IT WILL HAPPEN SHE SAYS.......................

BREAKING..........................BUNTYS SMOKE SCREENS OF MR JONES????

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VERA WE CAN REVEAL AFTER BEING AWAY FROM THE STATION AGAIN FOR MONTHS IS HAVING COUNSELLING AOVER FINDINGS AT THE STATION WHILST CLEANING. IVE BEEN TRAUMATISED BY WHAT IVE SEEN AND WHAT WITH THE DOG AS WELL ITS ALL BEEN TOO MUCH SHE SAYS.........................

BREAKING........................VERAS HAVING COUNSELLING OVER FINDINGS AT VERULAM???

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ANDY SAYS BRUISER IS LAUGHING AT WHITE VAN MANS THREATS , SAYING HE WANTS TO GROW A BIT BEFORE I CAN EVEN SEE HIM, MIND YOU WE HOPE WHITE VAN MAN DOESNT HAVE A JACK RUSSELL DOG WITH HIM OR IT COULD BE A DIFFERENT STORY.....................

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WE HEAR THAT BANGER PHONED DERECK STAINES TONIGHT SAYING MR STAINES BE READY AT 2PM AFTER THE ANDY HOUR TO TAKE ME HOME, I MUST LEAVE ON TIME AS I HAVE ANOTHER ENGAGEMENT, AND UPON ARRIVAL AT MY RESIDENCE TO DO NOT DRIVE THE GATES, AS I DONT WANT YOUR  TYRE MARKS ON MY DRIVE...............I THANK YOU  & GOODNIGHT

BREAKING.......................BRUISER LAUGHS OFF WHITE VAN MANS THREATS???

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BANGER WANTS  HIS VENTURES TO GO UNDER A  NEW NAME AND ITS, BANGER HOLDINGS , HE THINKS IT WILL BE WIDELY RESPECTED .............................

BREAKING.......................BANGER HOLDINGS????


BREAKING....................REPORTS ......BANGER PHONES MR STAINES

SPECIAL REPORT.......................STEVEN HALL



STEVE TELLS US THAT ANDY IS TO START UP A BANGER BUS TOUR AGAIN ACROSS ST ALBANS AND BEYOND ALTHOUGH IT PROBABLY WONT GO FAR........BUN TY IS LOOKING TO START UP HORSE RIDING COURSES, AND ANDY WANTS TO RUN FOR MAYOR AGAIN IN ST ALBANS............................THANKS STEVE

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WE HEAR  BUNTY IS BITTERLY DISSAPOINTED AFTER NOT PICKING UP AN OSCAR TODAY. SHE HAD HIGH HOPES  FOR HER ADAPTION OF, THE LIFE  OF A CIGAR! . BUNTY SAYS SHE HAD HOPED TO PICK AN AWARD FOR HER WORK.....................

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BANGER TRIED TO EVICT BETTY & BERTY BIG TEETH LAST NIGHT FOR WHAT HE SAYS WAS A DISRESPECT OF HIS HONOUR. IM A SIR HE SAID PLEASE REMEMBER   THAT OTHERWISE YOU CAN GO RIGHT NOW.........................DEAR O DEAR

BREAKING......................BUNTYB EXPECTS AT THE OSCARS?????

Wednesday 15 January 2014

BREAKING ..........BANGER SAYS NEVER MIND BIG BROTHER TONIGHT HE'S MAKING A DOUBLE EVICTION OF HIS OWN ?????

BREAKING .....,,,,EL BEE ALWAYS RIDE ON. TIME. !!!!!

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REPORTS TONIGHT THAT BANGER PHONED BARNWELL AND DEMANDED  THAT HE PICKED UP AT  12.30PM ON THE DOT SAT FOR THE ANDY HOUR , DON'T BE LATE HE SAID PIFFING ON HIS PIPE YOU DON'T  WANT  TO LET A SIR DOWN  DO YOU OTHERWISE ILL HAVE YO PHONE THE QUEEN HE SAID AND PUT YHE PHONE DOWN ...........

BREAKING............BANGER PHONES BARNWELL TO ARRANGE PICK UP SAT ????


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WE HEAR  FOLLOWING THREATS ON SAT FROM WHITE VAN MAN ANDY HAS BRUISER ON 24 HOUR BANGER CONTROL . HE GOES EVERYWHERE I GO HE SAID INFACT  HE NOW EVEN ALSO  SLEEPS WITH ME AND BETTY FOR EXTRA SECURITY !!'n

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YES THE SECRETS OUT READ ALL ABOUT IT CHAS HAS A NEW JOB AS A PAPER BOY HE DELIVERS THE PAPERS  TO RADIO  VERULAM , WE HOPE TO GET HOM IN ON THIS  WEEKS SHOW , BIT OF A CLIMBDOWN FOR CHAS DON'T YOU THINK  SINCE HE LOST HIS JOB TO FRED..........

Tuesday 14 January 2014

BREAKING...........BRUISER ON 24HOUR BANGER PATROL ?????

BREAKING ..........READ ALL ABOUT IT , CHAS HAS A NEW JOB????

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HAVE A BLOW DRY WITH A DIFFERENCE WITH BUNTY. UNLIKE A USUAL BLOW DRY FOR YOUR HAIR BUNTY SAYS SHE USES A SPECIAL TECHNIQUE BY BLOWING CIGAR SMOKE ON THE HAIR TO NOT ONLY MAKE IT DRY  BUT ALSO TO GIVE IT THAT SENSE OF CIGAR ODOUR ..........TRY ONE TODAY

Monday 13 January 2014

BREAKING ..........BUNTY BLOW DRY??????

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HOW DO YOU FANCY BEING A RADIO PRESENTER , WELL. WHY NOT  LEARN THE BANGER WAY, AT THE BANGER BROADCASTING SCHOOL. YOU'LL HAVE EXPERTISE TUTION FROM ONE OF THE KINGS OF BROADCASTING THE LEGENDARY BROADCASTER HIMSELF SIR ANDY BANGER. AFTER A SHORT INTENSIVE COURSE YOU TOO WILL BECOME A PROFESSIONAL  BUT ONLY AT BANGER BROADCASTING SCHOOL ..........

BREAKING .......... B B S ?????

Friday 10 January 2014

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YES LIFE LESSONS FROM PSYCHIC BUNTY, WITH TRULY  ASTONISIHING CIGAR POWERS. SHE WILL TEACH YOU THE 7 VERY IMPORTANT LIFE LESSONS AND BRING OUT YOUR NATURAL SMOKING ABILITIES.........................

BREAKING........................LIFE LESSONS WITH BUNTY???

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BANGER CLAIMS HE HAS A RIVER IN HIS FIELD THAT IS ONE OF THE MOST FAMOUS LONG RIVERS IN THE WORLD.....................RIVER BANGER. YES IT IS ABOUT AN INCH DEEP AND VERY LONG, WELL SO HE THINKS ANYWAY ITS HARDLY THE AMAZON...................

BREAKING...................RIVER BANGER????


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BANGER HAS SET UP A BANGER FLOODLINE TO ASSIST WITH THE CURRENT UK  FLOOD SITUATION, HE SAID  HE HAS ALSO NOTICED THE WATERS  RISING WHERE HE IS ESPECIALLY IN THE BATH AND WHEN BETTYS IN THERE.........................DEAR O DEAR

BREAKING..........................BANGER FLOODLINE?????


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ANDY PLANS TO RELEASE A BOOK SOMETIME LATER THIS YEAR ALL ABOUT HIM CALLED .....................LONG LIVE THE ANDY................CANT WAIT!

Thursday 9 January 2014

BREAKING......................LONG LIVE THE ANDY?????


BREAKING..........................EL BEE, THESE WHEELS WERE MADE FOR RIDING!!!!!!


BREAKING.................................BUNTYS LIFE IS ONE BIG SMOKE????


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YES UNBELIEVABLY ANDY HAS PHONED MR STAINES, MR HALL & BARNWELL THIS EVENING DEMANDING THEY RETURN HIS MOGGY MINOR IN ONE PIECE, SAYING HE WANTS NOT JUST THE WHEELS BUT THE WHOLE VEHICLE RETURNED IMMEDIATELY AND ACCUSSING THEM OF PLAYING A JOKE ON HIM.....................  DEAR O DEAR

BREAKING........................BANGER ACCUSSES MR STAINES. MR HALL & BARNWELL OF STEALING HIS MOGGY MINOR?????

MORE............BANGERS WEEK JUST GOT WORSE




YES WE HEAR AS WELL AS RAMBO HUNTING HIM DOWN IT SEEMS HES MOGGY MIINOR HAS BEEN STOLEN ANDYS FUMING,  WHITE VAN MAN SEEMS THE MAIN SUSPECT???.......................WHOS THAT DESPERATE?????

Wednesday 8 January 2014

BREAKING.......................BANGERS WEEK JUST GOT EVEN WORSE???????

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YES RAMBO GAVE BANGER AN UNPLEASANT SURPISE LAST NIGHT WHEN HE TRIED TO GET IN HIS RESIDENCE HE YELLED AND SHOUTED BETTY, BETTY THAT BLOOMING DOG OF BUNTYS IS AT THE DOOR HOW DID HE FIND ME , JUST GET RID OF HIM AND ANDY HID UNDER THE BED WE HEAR. BUNTY WAS CALLED TO THE RESIDENC EB Y BETTY TO TAKE HIM HOME. APPARANTLEY ANDY WAS SO SCARED HE DIDNT COME OUT FROM UNDER THE BED ALL NIGHT BETTY SAID............NOW HE HAS PUT A SIGN FOR RAMBO OUTSIDE THE BANGER RESIDENCE SINCE HIS VISIT.............................

BREAKING.....................ANDY GETS A VISITOR THROUGH HIS FLAP IN DOOR LAST NIGHT................OOOPS RAMBO!


Tuesday 7 January 2014

BREAKING........................ REPORTS, ANDY GETS A NASTY VISITOR THIS EVENING, WELL LOOK WHO IT IS ITS RAMBO????


BREAKING.........................BUNTY TELLS EVERYONE TO BE AWARE.....IF YOU SEE RAMBO DO NOT APPROACH HIM HES ANGRY & HUNGRY SHE SAYS


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WELL, WE HEAR TONIGHT BANGER HAS ORDERED BETTY TO LOCK ALL WINDOWS AND DOORS, AND TOLD HER TO CALL HIM SIR FROM NOW ON THAT HES BEEN KNIGHTED. BRUISER WILL NOT GO OUT EITHER, AND EL BEE TRIED TO GET HOME AT RECORD BREAKING SPEED AFTER SPOTTING RAMBO. EL BEE SAYS I DONT KNOW WHERE HE  WAS GOING BUT HE WAS ANGRY, LOOKED LIKE HE LOSE IT HE SAID. MEANTIME RAMBOS STILL MISSING WIT BUNTY OUT LOOKING FOR HIM WITH FELICITY.................

BREAKING.......................BANGER ALSO TELLS BETTY TO CALL HIM SIR FROM NOW ON?????


BREAKING............................ANDY ORDERS BETTY TO LOCK ALL THEIR WINDOWS AND DOORS?????

BREAKING.....................EL BEE SAYS HE THINKS HE SAW RAMBO WHILST OUT ON A RIDE????

BREAKING.....................CHAS & VERA ....TWOS COMPANY, BUT WITH FRED THREES A CROWD?????


BREAKING......................RAMBO ON THE RAMPAGE?????


BREAKING.......................BRUISER THE BODYGUARD TOO WONT GO OUT ALONE WE HEAR???

BREAKING...........................REPORTS THAT .ANDY WONT LEAVE THE HOUSE UNTIL RAMBO FOUND?????

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BUNTY HAS SAID SHE IS DEEPLY CONCERNED FOR RAMBOS WHEREABOUTS. SHE SAID THE NAME ANDY WAS MENTIONED THE OTHER EVENING IN CONVERSATION WITH FELICITY AND HE WENT MAD BEFORE RUNNING OFF OUTSIDE THE BACK DOOR..........ANYONE WITH ANY INFORMATION ON RAMBO ARE  ASKED CONATCT US ASAP......................

Thursday 2 January 2014

BREAKING..............................BANGERS NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS??????


BREAKING........................A NEW YEARS WISH FOR CHAS & VERA?????


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YES EVEN BERTY BIG TEETH, SAYS HES TEETH MAY EVEN GO ON SALE THIS MONTH,  HE SAYS  PEOPLE MAY BE INTERESTED IN BUYING A SET LIKE HIS, OF THEIR OWN, .......................

BREAKING......................THE BERTY BIG TEETH SALE?????...................

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EVERYONES HAVING A SALE IT SEEMS, EVEN EL BEE SAYS RIDE IN TO THE NEW YEAR WITH A BRAND NEW NIKE IVE GOT SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE, COME DOWN AND SEE FOR YOURSELF YOU WONT BE DISSAPOINTED......................

BREAKING.......................NOW EL BEES........................BIG BIKE SALE


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GRAB YOU FAVOURITE CIGAR IN THE BIG BUNTY CIGAR CLEAROUT, EVERYTHING  FROM COLUMBIAN, TO CUBAN, TO  ALL BRANDS SHE SAYS AT DISCOUNT PRICES...............THE BIG CIGAR SALE ON TODAY, COME AND SMOKE AWAY

BREAKING......................THE BUNTY CIGAR SALE....................NOW ON!


MORE......................THE BANGER SALE

YES BANGER SAYS EVERYTHING MUS GO , INCLUDING, BETTY, MOGGY MINOR, BAGS OF SAUSAGES, AND MORE...................THING IS HAS ANYIONE TOLD HIM NO ONES INTERESTED