BREAKING........................BANGER SAYS HIS CHRISTMAS STATEMENT NEXT WEEK WILL SEE BIG BETTY CUTS........................

LATEST.......................THE VERULAM CHOIR TO MAKE THEIR FIRST CHRISTMAS APPEARANCE ON SHOW THIS YEAR................

BREAKING................................CHAS & VERA SEEN WEARING RINGS???????

UPDATE..............................BUNTY ALSO NOW IN SO CALLED RECOVERY FROM THE MYSTERY VIRUS SAID SHE BECAME VERY BREATHLESS WITHOUT CIGARS AND INSISTED THE DOCTOR TOLD HER TO INCREASE THE NUMBER THAT SHE SMOKES , SURELY NOT BUNTY??????

BREAKING.........................BUNTY BREATHLESS WITHOUT CIGARS???????

UPDATE............................YES ANDY IS FINALLY OFF HIS SICK BED AND WILL BE ON THIS WEEKS SHOW, HOWEVER WE HEAR HE IS STILL VERY PARANOID OF BECOMING INFECTED AGAIN FROM BARNWELL AND WILL BE COMING IN THIS WEEK INA QUARANTINE SUIT WOULD YOU BELIEVE WE HAVE ACPTURED HIM ON CAMERAIN IT TODAY AND WILL PUBLISH THIS LATER..............DEAR O DEAR

LATEST............................ANDY OFF HIS SICK BED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1