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WOULD YOU, COULD YOU ENJOY A CIGAR ON A PLATE??????? WELL IT COULD BE A NEW THING THAT COULD CATCH ON , SHE SAYS THE CIGAR CONNASUEER WOULD ENJOY  A PUFF AND COULD REACH OUT FOR ANOTHER COURTESY OF A PLATE!!!!!!

BREAKING...........................BUNTY SAYS HAVE YOU TRIED CIGAR ON A PLATE????????

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BANGER HAS SAID FORGET BLACK FRIDAY, PREPARE FOR BANGER FRIDAY, HE EXPECTS TO HAVE RECORD SALES FOR ALL HIS VENTURES, IM EXPECTING TO SELL MORE SAUSAGES, MORE BOATS, MORE PIPES, MOGGY MINORS ESPECIALLY TO MR STAINES......................HE SAYS

BREAKING........................FORGET BLACK FRIDAY , PREPARE FOR BANGER FRIDAY ???????

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WE WILL HAVE A RECORDING ON THE WONDERFUL ANDY OF OZ THIS WEEK???????? PLEASE................

BREAKING ..........................WE ARE OFF TO SEE THE ANDY , WONDERFUL ANDY OF OZ??????????

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WE HEAR THAT BARNWELL, GOT A CALL FROM BUNTYS BUTLER WHO  HAS A STRANGE NAME AND VOICE SAYING LADY  BUNTY IS  EXPECTING  YOU AND YOUR GOOD LADY AT HER MANSION FOR EVENING DINNER THIS EVENING, PLEASE DONT BE LATE.................NO COMMENT FROM BARNWELL ON THE CALL

BREAKING..........................BARNWELL GETS CALL FROM BUNTYS BUTLER?????

SPECIAL REPORT FROM STEVE HALL................................

.STEVEN TELLS US THAT BANGERS MOGGY MINOR HAS BEEN TOWED AWAY, AND HE SUSPECTS AL BEE IS BEHIND IT FOR REVENGE, ALSO  BUNTY IS APPARANTLEY GETTING EVERY BODY A PACK OF HAMLET CIGARS FOR XMAS AT VERULAM,  & FELICITY WOULD LIKE VERYONE TO GO ON A GHOST HUNT FOR XMAS......................THANKS STEVE, 

BREAKING........................BERTY BIG TEETH GETTING SNAPPY ????????

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ARE YOU READY TO TRAIN AT THE BANGER SCHOOL OF SAUSAGES, YOULL BE TAUGHT BY THE HEAD CHEF, KING OF SAUSAGES HIMSELF , BANGER. HE WILL GUIDE THROUGH FROM PREPARING A  SAUSAGE TO COOKING , AND FINAL PRESENTATION, APPARANTLEY COURSES ARE SELLING FAST............................

BREAKING........................BANGER SCHOOL OF SAUSAGES?????

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WE HEAR THAT THE BANGERS ARE MAKING  SONGS FOR THEIR  MUSICAL, WE WILL HAVE RECORDINGS OF EACH OF THEIR SONGS THIS SAT ON THE SHOW, AT THE MOMENT THEY ARE NOT GIVING ANYTHING AWAY..........................

BREAKING...... THE BANGERS GET ALL MUSICAL????

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BUNNY IS PLANNING A HORSE REUNION. HORSES FROM ALL OVER THE COUNTRY ARE,INVITED TO CONGREGATE AT BUNTYS MANSION. THAT'S A LOT OF ALL HORSES BUNTY

BREAKING.......... BUNTY PLANNING A HORSE REUNION???

BELOW A PIC  OF BUNTY & FELICITY ENJOYING A HORSE RIDE TOGETHER

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BANGER HAS RECALLED ALL HIS MOGGY  MINORS HE'S SOLD,,  HE SAYS THERE'S A FAULT ON THEM

HE CLAIMS THAT THE,BREAKS,FONT WORK AND BUYERS,OF THE VEHICLES CLAIM THEY HAVE BEEN ABLE TO STOP AND ENDING UP GOING FURTHER THAN THEY INTENDED,.

BREAKING..........BANGER RECALL????

BELOW IS A PHOTO OF A YOUNG BETTY IN HER EARLY SAUSAGE DAYS..........................

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THIS CHRISTMAS, THE BANGER GROTTO IS THE PLACE TO VISIT. YES FATHER BANGER WILL BE THERE TO MEET AND GIVE PRESENTS TO THE CHILDREN, ALTHOUGH MORE LIKELY THEY ARE LIKELY TO BE PIPES OR SAUSAGES WRAPPED UP, SO TO AVOID DISSAPOINTMENT FOR YOUR CHILDREN THIS XMAS AVOID A GROTTO THAT SAYS COME AND SEE FATHER BANGER

BREAKING........................ THIS CHRISTMAS , FATHER BANGER ???????

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IS BANGER PARANOID????  HE NOW THINKS PEOPLE ARE FOLLWING, HIM HE BELIEVES MR STAINES, MR HALL, BARNWELL, & OTHERS ARE FOLLOWING HIM. HE SAID I WILL NOT HAVE YOU FOLLOWING ME TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT IM UP TO HE SAYS.................................DEAR O DEAR

BREAKING...............BANGER SAYS STOP FOLLOWING ,ME ???????

BREAKING.....................VERA EXCITED TO BE CLEANING, BACK AT VERULAM STUDIOS FROM DEC!!!!!!!

BREAKING.......................EL BEE VOWS TO BET BACK ON BIKE ?????

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BANGER COULD BE OFF TO THE JUNGLE FOR IM A CELEBRITY GET ME OUT OF HERE SERIES. HE CLAIMS THAT THE JUNGLE IS WAITING FOR HIM TO MOVE IN ????

BREAKING......................BANGER OFF TO THE JUNGLE???????

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SEEMS BUNTYS LIFE HAS ALWAYS BEEN STABLE, MUST HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH HORSES MAYBE ????

BREAKING......................BUNTY SAYS HER LIFE HAS ALWAYS BEEN STABLE??????

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PREPARE YOURSELF , BANGER TOO HAS ALSO RUINED ANOTHER SONG, SPACER, FIND OUT MORE AGAIN ON THE SHOW THIS SAT.........................

BREAKING ....................SPACER BANGER?????

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WE HEAR THAT BUNTY HAS RUINED THE WEST HAM FC ANTHEM IM FOREVER BLOWING BUBBLES, ALL WILL BE REVEALED ON THE SHOW ON SAT.......................

BREAKING...............................BUNTY RUINS HAMMERS ANTHEM?????

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A,LOCAL NEWSAGENT HAS VOICED HIS SHOCK AFTER SEEING MANIKIN WALK IN AND BROWSING AT THE CIGARS.

I WAS ASTONISHED HE SAID ITS NOT EVERY DAY WE HAVE A HORSE WALK IN LOOKING AROUND ESPECIALLY AT CIGARS HE JUST GRINNED SHOWING ME HIS,BIG TEETH WHEN HE FOUND. WHAT HE WAS LOOKING FOR........

BREAKING......... NEWSAGENT SHOCKED WHEN MANIKIN.WALKS I'N???!!

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FELICITY SAYS DO YOU WANT TO KNOW THE FUTURE?  THEN ALLOW ME TO GUIDE YOU WITH MY CARDS,  I HAVE ALL THE ANSWERS SHE SAYS,  APPLY FOR, A CONSULTATION TODAY......

BREAKING....... FELICITY. SAYS SHES ,SEEN THE FUTURE IT'S,IN THE CARDS???

BREAKING ANOTHER DAY / ANOTHER CLAIM WELL FOR BANGER......... SPECIAL REPORT FROM STEVEN HALL

STEVE TELLS US THAT HIS MOLE HAS BEEN INFORMED THAT BANGER UNBELIEVABLY AGAIN HAS REVERSED HIS MOGGY MINOR IN TO HIS NEIGHBOURS GARAGE DOOR.

BANGERS NEIGHBOUR,SAID HE WRECKLESLY. JUST DROVE IN TO IT. HE HAS NO CONSIDERATION FROM ANYONE HE SAYS AND WHEN I SAID TO HIM YOU'VE HUT MY GARAGE DOOR HE JUST REPLIED OH YES I DID IT WAS IN THE WAY.....

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YES  BETTY FLU, HAVE YOU BEEN VACCINATED,  APPARENTLY AS NTKEY ANDY TELLS US THAT BETTY FLU  IS HIGHLY CONTAGIOUS,  HE SAYS ITS A SERIOUS CONDITION....... DEAR O DEAR

BREAKING........ BETTY FLU?????

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HAVE YOU GOT THE BANGER FACTOR?  WELL IT'S ANDY ANSWER TO THE X FACTOR,  YOU NEED TO HAVE A FIRST CLASS KNOWLEDGE OF SAUSAGES,  BE AN EXPERT ON MOGGY MINORS,  AND OF COURSE AND BE A PROFESSIONAL PIPE SMOKER,  HAVE ALL THESE QUALITIES THEN APPLY STRAIGHT AWAY.......

BREAKING....... THE BANGER FACTOR?????

BREAKING...... ANDY SAYS MR STAINES IS MOGGY MINOR ENTHUSIAST?????

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WE HEAR FROM BETTY,  BUNTY  & OTHERS THAT BANGER IS SUFFERING FROM SOME SORT OF LIFE CRISIS


QUESTION IS,  IS IT A MID LIFE OR END OF LIFE CRISIS,  SSSSSSSHHHH DON'T MENTION IT TO HIM IF YOU SEE HIM HE GETS VERY TOUCH ABOUT IT!!!!!

BREAKING....... BANGER SUFFERING FROM A MID LIFE OR END OF LIFE CRISIS????? I

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WITH THE  BRITISH PRIME MINISTER IN AUSTRALIA VISITING THE AUSTRALIAN PARLIAMENT,  ANDY SAYS HE TOO WILL BE VISITING THE AUSTRALIAN MARINE MINISTER AND THANKED DAVID CAMERON FOR  WARMING THINGS UP FOR HIM.

THE MAIN EVENT IS ME HE SAID,  AND BETTER IS MAKING ALK THE READER ARRANGEMENTS FOR ME,  BUT MR CAMERON CAN COME HOME NOW HES DONE ENOUGH......

BREAKING....... BANGER ALSO TO VISIT AUSTRALIAN PARLIAMENT???

BREAKING....... RL.BEE. SAYS HE WILL SOON BE RIDING AGAIN.???

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WE HAVE HAD REPORTS THAT LUNCHTIME PRESENTER IAN COLYER HAS BEEN SMOKING A PIPE ON BREAKS DURING HIS PROGRAMME.

ANDY SAYS WHY ARE WE ALL SO SURPRISED A LOT OF PRESENTERS GO UT BUT DON'T ADMIT IT????

BREAKING........ IAN COLYER SEEN SMOKING A PIPE????

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ANDY SAYS HE CAN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT ALL THE FUSS IS ABOUT WITH THE RECENT JUBILATION OVER LANDING ON A.COMET.  I DID THAT YEARS AGO. WHY  DO PEOPLE KEEP COPYING WHAT I DO., HE SAYS..........

BREAKING....... BANGERS COMET????

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WE HEAR THAT BRUISER HAS BEEN BATTLING ALL HIS LIFE

I LOVE A GOOD BATTLE HE SAYS,  WHO'S NEXT?????

BREAKING....... BATTLING BRUISER????

SPECIAL REPORT BY STEVEN HALL....

STEVE TELLS US THAT BANGERS ORGANISING SPECIAL OUTDOOR EVENTS FOR ST ALBANS RESIDENT BUT THESE WILL TAKE PLACE AT THE BANGER MANSION.

ALSO FELICITY WANTS TO HIVE EVERYBODY AT THE STATION A PERSONAL TAROT READING,  BUNTYS LOVE OF HORSES STARTED AS A CHILD WHEN SHE HAD A PONY, AND,BANGER TO CONVINCE CAR MANUFACTURERS THAT THE MOGGY MINOR IS THE CAR OF THE 21ST CENTURY.....

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WELL IT MAYBE CHILDREN IN NEED BUT BANGER IN NEED IS ALSO ONCE AGAIN PLEADING TO YOUR HEARTS..

PLEASE GIVE GENEROUSLY AND DONATE WHATEVER YOU CAN, WASTE NO TIME PLEASE I AM STRUGGLING HE SAYS..... DEAR O DEAR

BREAKING........ BANGER IN NEED???

BREAKING....... CHEEKY CHAS TO APPLY FOR THE,LATE SHIFT SO HE HE CAN SEE VERA?????

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YES THE BUNTY. BLOWATHON, YOU CAN GUESS IT'S ALL ABOUT CIGARS,  AND SHE IS TRYING TO GET A BIG BLOWATHON.TOGETHER.

SHE BELIEVES A CHALLENGE IS AS GOOD AS ANYTHING.  AND THIS ONE IS TO SEE WHO CAN BLOW FOR THE LONGEST

BREAKING........ THE BUNTY BLOWATHON??????

BREAKING........ FELICITY SAYS UNCLE DERECKS FUTURE IS IN THE TAROT!!!!!!

I

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YES YOU'VE SEEN THE ADVERT THAT THE LADY LOVES MILK TRAY WELL BANGER TOO PLANS TO MAKE A COMMERCIAL WITH THIS ONE CALLED, IT'S ALL BECAUSE THE LADY LOVES SAUSAGE TRAY?  YES HE DELIVERS A BOX OF SAUSAGES  DEAR O DEAR......

BREAKING...... AND ALL BECAUSE THE LADY LOVES SAUSAGE TRAY????

SPECIAL REPORT BY STEVEN HALL.....................

STEVE TELLS US THAT HIS MOLE HEARS FELICITY IS OPENING A TAROT, CRYSTAL BALL, AND ALL THINGS SPIRITUAL SHOP IN ST ALBANS. ALSO ANDY SAYSTHAT HES A BUSINESSMAN WHOS EARNING MORE THAN RICHARD  BRANSON AND SHOULD BE TREATED WITH RESPECT......................MORE FOLLOWS

BREAKING..................FELICITY RECRUITING FOR TAROT READING CLASSES????

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AND AFTER THE LORD BANGER PROCESSION  LATER ON SATURDAY, THERE WILL BE THE CHANGING OF BANGERS GUARD, YES BRUISER WILL BE CHANGED OVER OUTSIDE HIS RESIDENCE BUT IN TO WHAT IS THE QUESTION ??????

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YOU MAY BE AWARE OF THE LORD MAYOR SHOW THIS SAT , BUT THE LORD BANGER SHOW ON SUNDAY ?? IS NEWS TO US.

ANDY SAYS HE WILL  IN A CARRIAGE IN A PROCESSION FROM ST ALBANS CITY CENTRE EN ROUTE TO HIS  MANSION, PLEASE COME ALONG AND CHEER HE SAYS !!!!

BREAKING......................BANGER CHANGING OF THE GUARD THIS WEEKEND?????

BELOW BRUISER AS BANGERS GUARD

BREAKING.............................THE LORD BANGER SHOW????????

BREAKING........ BUNTY HAVE HORSE PARADE OUTSIDE HER MANSION THIS WEEKEND????

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WE HEAR THAT BERTY BIG TEETH IS BEING FOLLOWED AROUND BY RABBITS,  WE THINK.IT'S BECAUSE THEY. ARE CONFUSED.  THEY CLASS HIM LIKE ONE OF  THEM.BECAUSE OF HIS  HUGE TEETH

BREAKING....... BERTY BIG TEETH BEING FOLLOWED BY RABBITS??? 7

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WE HEAR BUTTY IS CELEBRATING GUT FAWKES WITH A DIFFERENCE SHE'S HAVING A CIGARWORKS. DISPLAY.

YES SHE SAYS YOU LIGHT UP THE CIGARS,THEN THROW THEM IN THE AIR, SOUNDS DANGEROUS BUNTY

BREAKING......... BUNTY TO LET OFF CIGARWORKS OFF TONIGHT???

BREAKING..... BASIL BANGER SAYS. ACTION STATIONS, THE FIREWORKS ARE COMING!!!!!

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BANGER WOULD YOU BELIEVE HAS COME OUT WITH MORE RUBBISH BY SAYING THAT GUY FAWKES WAS A DISTANT RELATION. CAN YOU BELIEVE????

BREAKING...... OLD GUY FAWKES BANGER????

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WELL WE HAVE KNOWN ANDY FOR A LONG TIME AND HE HAS DONE DOME PRETTY SHOCKING THINGS BUT THIS TAKES THE BISCUIT.

CAN YOU BELIEVE WE HEAR THAT BANGER PHYSICALLY TOOK BETTY THROUGH THE STREETS SHOUTING PENNY FOR THE BETTY.  YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED BANGER, WORRYING THING   IS HE MADE QUITE A BIT OF...  MONEY........

BREAKING....... PENNY. FOR THE BETTY????

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BONFIRE BETTY? ?  YES APPARENTLY ANDY SAYS THAT BETTY WOULD MAKE THE FIRE BURN BETTER,  NOT THE REAL BETTY OF COURSE NO A MADE UP ONE.  A STUFFED BETTY?????

BREAKING......... BONFIRE BETTY?????

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THE BUNTY BAKE OVER,  NOT QUITE WHAT YOU THINK IT MEANS,  INSTEAD IT'S HER BAKING HER CIGARS BEFORE SMOKING THEM.

BUNTY SAID SHE CHALLENGES ANYONE TO A BAKE OFF.

BREAKING........ THE BUNTY BAKE OVER?????

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BANGER IS FUMING. THAT HE WAS NOT OFFERED THE SPORTS SUPREME HOUR.  THIS US UNACCEPTABLE HE SAYS AND DEMANDED THAT IT BE GIVEN TO HIM UNDER THE NAME THE SAUSAGE SUPREME HOUR?????

BREAKING....... BANGER WANTS THE SPORTS HOUR, AND WANTS YO CALL IT SAUSAGE SUPREME?????