Wednesday 31 October 2012
BREAKING...............
TURNS OUT THE NOISES AND THE SLAMMING OF THE DOOR WAS BY ANDY WHO JUST TURNED UP WITH SOME TRICK AND TREATS.....WE WILL HAVE A RECORDNG OF WHAT HAPPENED ON THIS WEEKS SAT SUPREME ......................
LATEST.................JUST SENT TO US
BUNTYS HAUNTED MANSION NIGHT IS UNDERWAY.......................
WE ARE HEARING THAT A CROWD OF GUESTS ARE INSIDE BUNTYS MANSION BY CANDELIGHT AWAITING SPOOKY THINGS TO HAPPEN, BUNTY IS NATURALLY HOSTIN G THE EVENINGS EVENTS WE EVEN HEAR BANGER MAY TURN UP LATER..............
Tuesday 30 October 2012
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ANDY NOW SAYS THAT HE IS LIKELY TO BE CHOSEN TO APPEAR IN THE NEW SERIES OF IM A CELEBRITY GET ME OUT OF HERE SOON...HE SAYS THAT THE PRODUCERS HAVE APPROACHED HIM ALREADY AND OFFERED HIM A FORTUNE............YES ANDY, WELL YOUR NOT EXACTLY A CELEB ARE YOU??
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VERA WE HEAR HAS HAD SOME SLEEPLESS NIGHTS RECENTLY DUE TO LAVATORY NIGHTMARES..WE HEAR SHE HAS WOKEN UP SCREAMING DUE TO BEING SCARRED OF HER TRAUMA IN THE RADIO VERULAM LAVATORY..ONE CLOSE SOURCE SAYS SHE IS A BAG OF NERVES.........
Monday 29 October 2012
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ANDY CLAIMS THAT HE WAS THE VOICE BEHIND THE BOSS OF CHARLIES ANGELS , YES HE SAYS HE SAYS IT WAS HIM APPAEANTLEY. STRANGE REALLY AS IT DOSENT SOUND LIKE HIM BUT HE INSISTS HE'S VOICE ONLY BROKE A FEW YEARS BACK AS HE WAS A LATE DEVELOPER.....DEAR O DEAR
LATEST........
WITH HURRICANE SANDY HEADING FOR AMERICA, CAN YOU BELIEVE BANGER SAYS HE CANNOT UNDERSTAND WHY HURRICANES ARE NOT NAMED AFTER HIM AND IS EVEN COMPLAINING TO THE NATIONAL HURRICANE CENTRE IN THE US. MEANWHILE HE SAYS TYPHOON BETTY IS HEADING FOR THE BATHROOM......DEAR O DEAR
Thursday 25 October 2012
BREAKING.................ANDY STILL SCARING ST ALBANS PUBLIC...........
WE HEAR BANGER HAS BEEN ONCE AGAIN SCARING THE PUBLIC OF ST ALBANS...WE HEAR EVEN THOUGH ITS STILL A WEEK AWAY TO HALLOWEEN BANGER HAS BEEN CREEEPING UP ON ELDELRY CITIZENS SAYING TRICK OR TREAT, HOWEVER ONE LADY RETALIATED SAYING YOURE IN FOR A TRICK AND A TREAT AND HIT HIM WITH HER HAND BAG HE RAN OFF.........DEAR O DEAR
Wednesday 24 October 2012
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YES VERA & CHAS HAVE BEEN SEEN TOGETHER WE HAVE HAD WITNESS REPORTS OF VERA BEEN SEEN CRYING IN TO THE ARMS OF CHAS. APPARANTLEY THIS TOOK PLACE OUTSIDE A PUBLIC LAVATORY ONE PERSON TOLD US IT LOOKED LIKE SHE NEEDED TO GO IN TO THE TOILET BUT COULDN'T .....
Tuesday 23 October 2012
UPDATE........BUNTYS HAUNTED RESIDENCE
BUNTY CLAIMS HER RESIDENCE IS HAUNTED. SHE CLAIMS TO HAVE HEARD SPOOKY NOISES AND SEEN FACES OF GHOSTLY GHOULS MAINLY WHEN ANDY HAS STAYED OVER. BUT EVEN LATELY SHE CLAIMS THAT THE HORSES HAVE ALSO BEEN GETTING SCARED BY VARIOUS PARANORMAL ACTIVITY........
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YES HALLOWWENS ALMOST HERE AND ALREADY BANGER IS OUR SCARING THE YOUNG AND OLD . WE HEAR THAT DRESSED IN A WARLOCK COSTUME WITH A WITCHES HAT AND WE HAVE PICTURES TO BE PUBLISHED LATER IN THE WEEK HE HAS BEEN TERROISING NEUGHBOURHOODS. POLICE HAVE RECIEVED SEVERAL COMPLAINTS OF HARRASEMENT AND ATTACKS.....ANDY OF COURSE DENIES THIS
Monday 22 October 2012
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WITH ALL THE TALK OF THE WEATHER TURNING COLDER WITH AN ARCTIC BLAST LOOKING LIKELY SNDY SAYS WE SHOULD BE MORE WORRIED ABOUT THE SO CALLED ANDY BLAST.....APPARANTLEY THIS IS TO DO WITH HALLOWEEN AS ONCE AGAIN HE BELIEVES HE IS THE WIZARD OF ST ALBANS WITH SOME SURPRISES IN STORE.......
Thursday 18 October 2012
UPDATE......................
BUNTYS HAS SAID THAT SHES MAKING GOOD PROGRESS TRYING TO TRACK DOWN HER LONG LOST SISTER GRETTLE....GRETTLE WHO IS OLDER THAN HER AND ANDY DISSAPEARED SOME YEARS AGO AND LOST CONTACT WITH THE REST OF THE BANGERS BUT BUNTY HAS BEEN UP LATE AT NIGHT RECENTLY TRACING HER ON GENES REUNITED AND HAS TOLD US THAT SHE HAS ALMOST FOUND HER...........JUST DONT TELL ANDY BNUTY OR MENTION THE DOLLS
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YES ON YOUR SHELVES IN THE SHOPS BY CHRISTMAS ANDY PLANS TO REALEASE AN ALBUM CALLED ANDY ANTHEMS A CELEBRATION OF LOVE & BETTY....A NUMBER OF CLASSIC BANGER SONGS WILL BE RELEASED ON THE LAVATORTY LABEL HE SAYS.....WE HAVE GOT HOLD OF ONE NOT YET RELEASED WE WILL HAVE A RECORDING ONLY ON SAT SUPREME THIS SAT AS AN EXCLUSIVE........
LATEST....................
BUNTY HAS COME UNDER FIRE FOR HER LATEST IDEA , A BUNTY BREATHATHON, WHERE PARTAKERS WOULD DO BREATHING EXERCISES TO RID THEMSELVES OF CIGAR SMOKE.....WE HEAR LOTS OF PEOPLE HAVE BEEN ADMITTED TO A&E DEPARTMENTS AROUND THE COUNTRY AFTER TRYING THE EXERCISES AND BECOMING OUT OF BREATH RANGING FROM THE VERY YOUNG????? TO THE VERY OLD.....
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THE BANGERS BALL, ARE YOU INVITED???? ANDY SAYS HE WILL BE SENDING OUT INVITATIONS TO THE GRAND BANGERS BALL, BUT ONLY THE SELECTFEW WILL ATTEND AND MAYBE EVEN MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO AFFORD THIS LAVISH OCCASSION, ALL IN AID OF BANGER TRING TO IMPRESS AGAIN, THE LENGTHS HE WILL GO TOO...........
Wednesday 17 October 2012
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VERA SAYS SHE WILL BE MOST LIKELY REMAIN TRAUMATISED THANKS TO HER DISCOVERY IN THE RADIO VERULAM TOILET. SHE CANNOT EVEN GO IN TO A TOILET AT HOME AND BREAKS OUT IN HOT SWEATS AT THE THOUGHT OF IT........
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THE BUNTY BREATHATHON DESIGNED FOR THOSE WHO SMOKE CIGARS AND WANT TO EXHALE ALL THE SMOKE AND GET IT OFF THEIR CHEST SAYS BUNTY. SHE IS TRYING TO GET MORE TO FO THE SIMPLE EXERCISES INCLUDING THE HORSES OF COURSE.,,,,,
Tuesday 16 October 2012
UPDATE.........
ANDY IN HIS BID TO BECOME THE NEXT AMERICAN PRESIDENT HAS LOST THE CHANCE THE TO TAKE PART IN THE LAST HEAD TO HEAD OF THE ELECTORAL DEBATE IN THE USA. WE UNDERSTAND ANDY RECIEVED A PHONE CALL FROM THE PRODUCER OF THE SHOW TO SAY HE WAS UNHEARD OF IN AMERICA AND DID NOT HAVE EVEN ONE VOTE TO PUT HIM ON SCREEN FOR THE AMERICAN PEOPLE TO JUDGE....WE HEAR ANDY IS DEMANDING A RE RUN OF THE DEBATE AND CALLED IT COWARDLY AS HE SAID THAT THEY KNEW HE WOULD WIN......DEAR O DEAR
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YES FANCY GIVING YOUR LOVED ONE A BUNCH OF FLOWERS THAT THEY WILL REMEMBER AND THANK YOU FOR? THEN DON'T BOTHER GIVING THEM A BANGERS BOUQUET. APPARENTLEY WE HEAR THEZE ARE FRESH FROM HIS FIELD AND ARE ALREADY ON SALE, BETTY DOES THE WRAPPING ANDY DOES THE PICKING.....DEAR O DEAR
Monday 15 October 2012
UPDATE.........
THE BANGER BONANZA, YES WHERE YOU WILL FIND SOMETHING FOR ALL THE FAMILY. THE GREAT BANGER BONANZA TO BE HELD IN HIS FIELD ONE WEEKEND PROMISES TO HAVE SOMETHING FOR EVERYONE SO ANDY SAYS.......
Friday 12 October 2012
Thursday 11 October 2012
BREAKING.......................ANDY PREPARING TO WIN AMERICAN ELECTIONS.............
WE HEAR THAT ANDY SO CONFIDENT THAT HE WILL WIN THE ELECTION TO BECOME THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE USA SAYS THAT HE AND BETTY THE FIRST AMERICAN LADY MAY HAVE TO MOVE TO THE STATES....HE SAID WE CANNOT RUN THE COUNTRY FROM THE UK SO WILL AHVE TO DO THE RIGHT THING FOR COUNTRY AND PEOPLE..................DEAR O DEAR, YOU WONT HAVE TO BOTHER ANDY
ANDYS NEW ANTI BALDING TREATMENT GOES WRONG................
SAT SUPREME IS CONTINUING TO RECIEVE COMPLAINTS ABOUT BANGERS NEW ANTI BALDING TREATMENT, HE CLAIMS THAT SPREADING SAUSAGE CREAM ON THE SCALP WILL MAKE HAIR GROW BUT IT HAS HAD DISASTROU RESULTS THE LATEST CUSTOMER IS BELOW.....LOOK AT THE SIDE EFFECTS ITS HAD THIS MAN CANT EVEN SEE..................
UPDATE.............
ANDY IS TO ADDRESS THE PEOPLE OF AMERICA ON HIS BANGER INTERNATIONAL NETWORK TOMORROW, THAT IS REALLY GOING TO SPOIL THEIR DAY WE WILL HAVE A RECORDING OF THAT BROADCAST ON SATURDAY ON THE SHOW................
Wednesday 10 October 2012
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BUNTYS HORSES CAUSED CHAOS YESTERDAY ON THE HERTFORDSHIRE SECTION OF THE M25 AFTER THEY ESCAPED. MOTORISTS WERE SHOCKED TO WITNESS CONDOR, MANIKIN & HAMLET RUNNING TOGETHER SMOKJNG CIGARS APPARANTLEY MOTORISTS LOCKED THEIR WINDOWS AND DOORS WHEN THE HORSES WENT UP TO THE CARS SMILING. EVENTYALLY AFTER 3 HOURS THE HORSES WERE COAXED BACK TO THEIR STABLES BY BUNTY WHO APOLOGISED BUT SAID THEY NEEDED A RUN.......DEAR O DEAR
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APPARANTLEY VERA WAS SEEN ENTERING THE BANGER RESIDENCE LAST NIGHT , WE UNDERSTAND THAT IT WAS TO MAKE A RECORDING OF THE JOHNNY BE ROTTEN SONG FOR SATURDAY. VERA DID NOT LEAVE UNTIL THE EARLY HOURS OF THIS MORNING DID IT REALLY TAKE THAT LONG TO DO VERA ???????
Tuesday 9 October 2012
UPDATE.......................
THE LATEST VENTURE TO BE CREATED BY BANGER MAY HAVE BALDING PEOPLE EVERYWHERE JUMPING WITH EXCITEMENT, BUT BEFORE YOU DO WE WOULD STRONGLY RECCOMEND THAT YOU CONSIDER YOUR MOVES VERY CAREFULLY AS IT MAY NOT BE ALL IT SEEMS INFACT ALREADY WE ARE GETTING REPORTS OF THE ANTI BALDING TREATMENT GOING WRONG................ MORE AS WE GET IT
Monday 8 October 2012
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HUNGRY? WELL THERE'S ALWAYS BANGERS BEANS ALTHOUGH AFTER EATING SOME OF BANGEDS LATEST CREATION YOU MIGHT NOT BE HUNGRY ANYMORE. YES BANGERS BEANS ARE NOT YOUR AVERAGE BEAN THEY ARE GROWN IN HIS GARDEN AND DIPPED IN HIS OWN SPECIAL SAUCE HE TELL US......
Thursday 4 October 2012
DEVELOPING......................ANDY TO RUN AS A PRESIDENT................
WOULD YOU BELEIVE THAT ANDY THINKS HE COULD NOT ONLY RUN TO BE THE NEXT AMERICAN PRESIDENT BUT HE THINKS HE WILL WIN....HE SAYS THAT HE AND BETTY ARE READY TO RUN THE USA WITH BETTY THE FIRST AMERICAN LADY, AND HE SAID THAT AMERICANS HAD HAD ENOUGH OF OLD POLICIES AND WERE LOOKING TO THE BANGERS TO TAKE AMERICA IN A NEW DIRECTION....WE ASKED ANDY WHAT HE PLANS TO DO NEXT THEN HE SAID...(HAVE A NICE DAY NOW)...DEAR O DEAR
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BANGERS ORIGINAL, NOW WHATS HE UP TO? WELL HE CLAIMS TO HAVE CREATED THE BANGERS ORIGINAL CRISP, THE INGREDIEND AS ALWAYS REMAIN A SECRET, BUT ANDY TELLS US THESE WILL TASTE LIKE YOUVE NEVER TASTED BEFORE...........WELL WE CAN BELIEVE THAT ANDY
Wednesday 3 October 2012
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ANOTHER WORRY FOR ALL OF US, IT SEEMS THAT BANGER HAS CREATED A BODY WASH THAT WILL NO DOUBT CAUSE MORE CHAOS. IT LOOKS HARMLESS ENOUGH BUT WE ARE TOLD IT IS FAR FROM THAT, WE SHOULD ALL BE AWARE OF THE FACT THAT THERE COULD BE SOME LINGERING EFFECTS. SO BE WARNED YOUR NEXT WASH COULD BE ONE YOU'LL NEVER FORGET........
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VERA WHO MISSED THE SHOW SATURDAY SAYS SHE WAS UNDERGOING COUNSELLING DUE TO THE TRUAMATIC LAVATORY EXPERIENCE SHE HAD AT THE STATION A WEEK AGO. SHE SAYS SHE'S STILL IN SHOCK AND WAS NOT READY TO RETURN TO WORK YET.......
Tuesday 2 October 2012
UPDATE.........
BUNTY SAYS SHE WOULD LIKE TO COME BACK IN ANOTHER LIFE AS A HORSE. BUNTY WHO GREW UP WITH HORSES INDEED SHE USED TO SLEEP WITH ONE BY HER BED, HER MOTHER OWNED A STABLES AND REGULARLY THE HORSES WOULD SIT ROUND THE FINNER TABLE WITH THE BANGER FAMILY FOR EVENING MEALS, ANDY HOWEVER WAS SLWAYS JEALOUS OF THE HORSES WE ARE TOLD AS HE WANTED THE ATTENTION ON HIM......DEAR O DEAR HE HASN'T CHANGED
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GRAB A BANGERS BARGAIN, COULD BE ANYTHING FROM AN OLD ANTIQUE TO AN OUT OF DATE SAUSAGE. WE HEAR BANGER FANCIES HIMSELF AS A BIT OF A DEL BOY, HE CLAIMS TO AIM TO SELL MORE THAN THE 99p STORE WITH PRICES MUCH CHEAPER BANGERS BARGAINS WILL SELL AT 98p PER ITEM WELL, WHAT A BARGAIN ......DEAR O DEAR
Monday 1 October 2012
UPDATE.........
BANGERS BEER, A BEVERAGE OR POISON. WELL ONE THINGS FOR SURE THIS NEW IDEA TO MAKE AN ALCOHOLIC DRINK BY BANGER MUST SPELL DISASTER. APPARANTLEY HE IS BREWING IT IN HIS SHED AND WE DO NOT KNOW THE ACTUAL CONTENT BUT WE HEAR THAT IT'S VERY STRONG RUMOURS OF 100 PER CENT OR MORE......SURELY IT WILL BE BANNED?????
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