Monday, 30 April 2012
MORE........
ANDY HAS TOLD SAT SUPREME HE HAS LET WHITE VAN MANS TYRES DOWN AFTER HE PARKED DOWN HIS ROAD. WE HEAR THAT WHITE VAN MAN IS FURIOUS BLAMING BANGER, BARNWELL , STAINSEY AND HALL FOR IT. HE CLAIMS THAT ALL FOUR OF THEM WILL GET WHAT'S COMING TO THEM ......CAN YOU BELIEVE IT
Sunday, 29 April 2012
Friday, 27 April 2012
LATEST..................ANDY RELEASES SHIPPING FORECAST
AFTER HEARING ABOUT THIS WEEKS SEVERE WEATHER WARNING FOR HERTS ANDY HAS ISSUED A SHIPPING FORECASTB WITH BETTY WARNINGS FOR ALL AREAS, WE WILL HAVE THAT SHIPPING FORECAST ON THIS WEEKS SHOW...BELIEVE US IT HAS TO BE HEARD TO BE BELIVED HE OBVIOUSLY THINKS HE IS IN COMPETITION WITH BBC RADIO 4........
MORE
BUNTY IS TO HOLD A CIGAR PARTY AT HER REBOURNE MANSION ON SATURDAY NIGHT. WE HEAR EVERYONE IS WELVOME THST ARE CIGAR SMOKERS. SHE SAYS SHE WOULD ALDO WELCOME YOUNG CIGAR SMOKERS AND THE PERSON WHO'S CIGAR STAYS ALIGHT FOR LONGEDT AND WHO HAS THE MOST ATTRACTJVE ONE WILL WIN ANOTHER EVEN THE HORSES ARE INVITED. DEAR O DEAR O DEAR
LATEST....................BANWELL RECIEVES MORE CALLS
WE HEAR DARRELL ALIAS BARNWELL HAS RECIEVED NUMEROUS CALLS TODAY FROM WHITE VAN MAD SAYING HE WAS GOING TO KIDNAP BUNTY FOR A RANSOM IF HE COULDNT GET BANGER, THEN REGINALD SMYTHE CALLED HIM AGAIN, THEN ANDY, THEN BUNTY. BARNWELL SAID HIS PHONE HASNT STOPPED RINGING ALL DAY AND WAS NOW THINKING OF CHANGING HIS NUMBER............
Thursday, 26 April 2012
BREAKING.....................NEW CHARACTER ON SHOW
SAT SUPREME BRINGS YOU NEWS OF A NEW CHARACTER TO JOIN THE SHOW, POSSIBLY THIS WEEKEND, WATCH THIS SPACE.............
BREAKING................WHITE VAN MAN PHONES BARNWELL
WE ARE HEARING TONIGHT TONIGHT THAT BARNWELL RECIEVED A CALL TODAY AGAIN AT WORK FROM WHITE VAN MAN SAYING ..DO YOU DRIVE A MOGGY MINOR, AFTER BARNWELL SAID NO, THEN HE TOLD HIM THAT EITHER HE DOES OR STAINESY OR HALL. HE SAID ONE OF YOU DOES ....APPARANTLEY BANGER TOLD HIM IT WAS ONE OF THE PRESENTERS ON THE ANDY HOUR................
LATEST
BUNTY TO GIVE CRASH COURSE IN HORSE RIDING, SHE SAYS IF YOU ARE BRAVE ENOUGH COME AND JOIN US BUT IF YOU FALL OFF YOU WONT BE ABLE TO RE JOIN THE COURSE?????DEAR O DEAR
Wednesday, 25 April 2012
Tuesday, 24 April 2012
Monday, 23 April 2012
UPDATE........
WE HEAR BETTY FINISHED THE LONDON MARATHON AT 11AM THIS MORNING 24HRS LATER, ANDY HAS SAID IT'S A NEW WORLD RECORD FOR THE FASTEST TIME. NO ANDY THE WINNER FINISHED YESTERDAY.WE HEAR BETTY KEPT RUNNING THROUGH THE NIGHT, AND WAS EXHAUSTED AS SHE CROSSED THE LINE.ANDY HAS SAID SHE'S SUPER BETTY AND READY FOR THE OLYMPICS.....DEAR O DEAR
Thursday, 19 April 2012
LATEST..................ANDY BANNED FROM LONDON MARATHON
WE HEAR TODAY THAT ANDY HAS BEEN BANNED FROM THE LONDON MARATHON AS NO PIPES ALLOWED, WE ALSO HEAR BUNTY HAS BEEN BANNED BECAUSE SHE REFUSED TO GIVE UP HER CIGARS....MEANWHILE BETTY IS STILL IN THE RUNNING....RUN BETTY RUN!!!!
LATEST................WHITE VAN MAN SAYS ANDY HAS BEEN CUTTING HIM UP ON MOTORWAY AGAIN..............
NEWS COMING IN THAT WHITE AN MAN CAME ACROSS ANDY BY ACCIDENT TODAY HE WASNT LOOKING FOR HIM BUT ANDY CUT HIM UP ON THE MOTORWAY AND WOULDNT MOVE FOR MILES. APPARANTLEY EVENTUALLY ANDY SAW WHITE VAN MAN IN THE MIRROR AND DID A DETOUR....TONIGHT WHITE VAN MAN HAS BEEN ROUND THE BANGER RESIDENCE AGAIN LOOKING FOR HIM BUT ANDYS NOT THERE AGAIN............
UPDATE.........................
HAVE YOU HEARD THE LATEST...BRACE YOURSELF FOR BETTY & BUNTY RUNNING IN THE LONDON MARATHON, BUT ITS NOT CLEAR IF ANDY WILL BE RUNNING TOO. BOTH BETTY & BUNTY SAY THEY HAVE BEEN TRAINING, AND ARE READY BUT HERE COULD BE PROBLEMS AS BETTY IS HUGELY OVERWEIGHT AND BUNTY INSISTS ON PUFFING HER CIGARS ALL THE WAY...........................
Wednesday, 18 April 2012
UPDATE............
IT HAS BEEN REPORTED TONIGHT THAT BASIL BANGER HAS ACCUSED SAT SUPREME OF TRYING TO START ANOTHER WAR WITH HIM, DON'T PICK A BATTLE YOU CANNOT WIN HE SAID.......DEAR O DEAR
UPDATE.........BUNTY TO OPEN BEAUTY THERAPY SALON
YES BUNTY TO OPEN A BEAUTY THERAPY SALON BUT THIS ONE FOR HORSES,SHE SAYS HORSES WILL BE PAMPERED IN STYLE WITH THE HOOVES BEING POLISHED HAIR WASHED AND BLOW DRIED. ALSO MOISTURISER FOR THE FACE AND THEN A BATH WITH A CIGAR......AND ALL AT A PRICE OF £1000 FOR 1 HOUR.....HURRY GET YOUR HORSE BOOKED IN TO AVOID DISSAPOINTMENT......
Tuesday, 17 April 2012
UPDATE............
ANDY BANGER IS TO START ISSUING SHIPPING FORECASTS FOR THOSE ON THE HIGH SEAS. THAT CAN ONLY SPELL DISASTER FOR EVERY MARINER. INFACT THE MARINERS ASSOCIATION ON HEARING THIS HAVE CONDEMED THE IDEA SAYING THAT BANGER WILL CAUSE CHAOS FOR THE SEA LANES. ANDY WOULD YOU BELIEVE SAYS HE HAS SHIPPING EXPERIENCE IN THE BLOOD AND SAID HIS FATHER WAS A MERCHANT NAVY......WAKE UP ANDY
Monday, 16 April 2012
UPDATE........
WHITE VAN MAN HAS BEEN TRYING TO TRACK DOWN ANDY WHO IS ON THE RUN ALTHOUGH HE WONT ADMITT THIS AS HE'S STILL TELLING BETTY THAT HE HAS HAD TO GO AWAY ON BUSINESS WITH THE CHOIR. APPARANTLEY WE HEAR WHITE VAN MAN HAS BEEN MAKING DOOR TO DOOF ENQUIRIES AS TO ANDYS WHEREABOUTS, BUT NOBODY KNOWS.....
Sunday, 15 April 2012
LATEST.......ANDY SPENDS THE NIGHT IN BUNTYS STABLES
STEVEN HALL HAS YOKD US THAT HE'S MOLD HAS HEARD THAT BUNTY CLAIMS ANDY SPENT THE NIGHT IN HER STABLES TO HIDE AWAY FROM WHITE VAN MAN CAN YOU BELIEVE . WE HEAR THE HORSES HAD A ROUGH NIGHT WITH ANDT......THANKS STEVE FOR UPDATE
Friday, 13 April 2012
Thursday, 12 April 2012
UPDATE........................
TONIGHT ANDY BANGER WAS PAID A VISIT APPARANTLEY TO HIS HOME ADDRESS BY WHITE VAN MAN, BUT ANDY WASNT THERE, HE OBVIOUSLY HAD HEARD THAT HE WAS ON THE WAY AND DID A RUNNER HE TOLD BETTY HE HAD CHOIR PRACTICE, BUT WE HEAR HE TURNED UP AT THE STUDIOS OF RADIO VERULAM BEGGING CHARLIE FOR THE KEYS SO HE COULD STAY THE NIGHT AT THE STATION. OF COURSE CHARLIE TOLD HIM THAT HE WAS NOT PERMITTED TO DO SO AND TO JOG ON.....TONIGHT THE WHEREABOUTS OF ANDY IS UNKNOWN........RUNNING IN FEAR
UPDATE..............
BARNWELL IS FUMING BECAUSE TODAY HE RECIEVED HARRASSING CALLS AT WORK FROM REGINALD SMYTHE AT THE MAYORS OFFICE TO SAY COULD HE PLEASE STOP BUNTY CALLING HIM ABOUT HORSES TRANSPORT. AS WELL AS THIS HE THEN GOT CALLS FROM BUNTY TELLING HIM TO PHONE THE MAYORS OFFICE TO TELL REGINALD TO ANSWER THE PHONE....THEN ANDY PHONES HIM, AND WHITE VAN MAN TO SAY THAT HE WILL BE PAYING ANDY A VISIT......QUESTION IS WHO IS GIVING OUT BARNWELLS NUMBER TO ATHESE PEOPLE.....
Wednesday, 11 April 2012
UPDATE..................
SO CAN YOU BELIEVE THE LATEST ANDY WANTS TO BECOME LONDONS MAYOR AND BATTLE IT OUT WITH BORIS JOHNSON. APPARANTLEY OTHER CONTENDERS HAVE LAUGHED AT ANDYS AMBITIONS SAYING LONDON WILL FALL APART. ANDY SAY IF GIVEN THE CHANCE HE WILL AMKE LONDON A BETTER PLACE TO LIVE WITH BETTER TRANSPORT, HE BELIEVES ACTUALLY THAT LONDONS OLD VICTORIAN TRANSPORT SYSTEM SHOULD BE RE INTRODUCED, HE IS CONFIDENT HE COULD WIN LONDONERS VOTES.......ANDY WAKE UP....BELOW A PICTURE OF A BIKE ANDY SAYS THAT ALL LONDONERS WOULD HAVE TO USE IF HE GOT IN TO BEAT LONDONS GROWING GRIDLOCK....... 
UPDATE....................
WE HEAR THAT BUNTYS HORSES ARE IN TRAINING FOR THIS WEEKENDS GRAND NATIONAL, SHE IS GIVING THEM TRAINING HERSELF AND HOPES TO GET THEM QUALIFIED FOR THE RACE BY THE END OF THE WEEK. BUNTY SAID CONDOR, MANIKIN, AND HAMLET ARE IN FINE FETTLE WITH ALL THREE SMOKING WELL.............DEAR O DEAR
Tuesday, 10 April 2012
UPDATE...........
ANDY SAYS THAT AFTER BEING ON RADIO VERULAM FOR YEARS HE CONSTANTLY GETS STOPPED IN THE STREET WITH PEOPLE WANTING HIS AUTOGRAPH. HE SAID PEOPLE GET DTUCK FOR WORDS AND GET EXCITED WHEN HE TELLS THEM HE'S ANDY BANGER, THE OTHER DAY HE SAID I WENT IN TO A SHOP AND WHEN I TOLD THE WOMAN CASHIER WHO U WAS SHE FAINTED. PEOPLE GET STAR STRUCK WHEN THEY SEER I EVEN GET SCREAMING WOMEN COMING AFTER ME ......WHATEVER ANDY, THAT'S PROBABLY BETTY
Thursday, 5 April 2012
LATEST..............BANGER IN ROW WITH WATER COMPANY.....AND THEN CAUSES FLOOD!!!!!!
ANDY BANGER HAS GONE A STEP FURTHER THIS MORNING OVER A ROW WITH HIS WATER COMPANY ABOUT USING HOSE PIPES. WE HEAR ANDY HAD 6 BATHS DELIBERATELY THIS MORNING AND THEN LET THE BATH OVERFLOW FLOODING HIS FIELD AND NEARBY RESIDENTS GARDENS TOO.....ONE RESIDENT BELOW POINTS AT BANGERS HOUSE AFTER THE PRESS ASKED ASKED HER WHERE THE FLOOD CAME FROM....
THIS PICTURE JUST IN............
THIS PICTURE JUST IN............
UPDATE.................
WE HEAR ANDY BANGER WAS CAUGHT USING HIS HOSEPIPE THIS MORINING, THIS AFTER THE BAN CAME IN TO FORCE IN THE REGION AT MIDNIGHT LAST NIGHT..WE UNDERSTAND ANDY WAS WASHING HIS MOGGY MINOR WHEN HE RECIEVED A CALL FROM THE WATER COMPANY SAYING THAT IF HE DIDNT STOP HE WOULD FACE A FINE..THEN WE UNDERSTAND ANDY STARTED WATERING HIS PLANTS IN HIS FIELD DELIBERATELY. HE THEN RECIEVED ANOTHER CALL AGAIN DEMANDING HIM TO STOP, BUT HIS RESPONSE WAS ITS A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH, FOR THE GRASS & DANDELIONS.....DEAR O DEAR
UPDATE....................BANGER SELLING FAKE EGGS
BANGER SELLING FAKE EASTER EGGS AT UNBELIEVABLE PRICES, CONSUMERS REPORTING TO SAT SUPREME THAT THE EGGS ARE SO HOLLOW THAT THEY JUST CRUMBLE OTHERS SAY THAT THERE WAS NOTHING IN THE WRAPPER OR BOX. ONE LITTLE GIRL WAS VERY UPSET WHEN SHE THOUGHT SHE HAS CHOCOLATES IN AN EGG BUT NOTHING INSIDE AND THIS SEEMS TO BE THE A COMMON REPORT......PLEASE DO NOT BUY BANGERS EGGS THEY ARE FAKE AND YOU WILL BE DISSAPOINTED.............
Wednesday, 4 April 2012
UPDATE.......
ITS ALMOST EASTER AND GET SET FOR A PARADE THIS ONE NO ORDINARY PARADE BUT A BANGER EASTER PARADE, GUESS WHAT'S AT THE CENTRE OF IT YES THE MOGGY MINOR.BETTY WILL MAKE AN APPEARANCE, PLUS BUNTY ON HER HORSE AND ANDY AS THE MAD HATTER, WHAT A SURPRISE THERE. WE HEAR ALL WILL BE DRESSED UP, WITH BETTY IT'S RUMOURED AS A GIANT EASTER EGG, AND GOODNESS KNOWS WHAT BUNTY WILL BE, THERE'S ALSO GAURANTEEF TO BE HORSE SMOKING TOO. THE EXACT ROUTE OF THE PARADE ON EASTER DAY IS NOT KNOWN YET,IT SEEMS THE MAD HATTER HIMSELF IS PLAYING THINGS VERY DISCREETLY.........
Tuesday, 3 April 2012
LATEST........BUNTY WANTS TO BUY THE GRAND NATIONAL RACECOURSE..........
WELL WONDERS WILL NEVER CEASE BUNTY IT'S REPORTED TONIGHT IS LOOKING TO BUY THE GRAND NATIONSL RACECOURSE, MEANWHILE WE ALSO HEAR THAT SOME MEMBERS OF THE PUBLIC WERE SHOCKED TO SEE ONE OF HER HORSES SMOKING TODAY, EVEN THOUGH WE HAVE LONG REPORTED IT ON SAT SUPREME IT'S STILL A SHOCK TO SEE A SMOKING HORSE IN REAL LIFE.....
UPDATE...........
WE HEAR JUST AHEAD OF THE DIGITAL CHANGEOVER BANGER HAS ALREADY RETUNED HIS TV UNFORTUNATELY THIS RESORTED IN INTERFERING WITH MANY RADIO AND TV CHANNELS BEING MNOCKED IFF THEIR FREQUENCIES. IN SOME AREAS HOUSEHOLDERS REPORTED ITV BECOMING A FOREIGN CHANNEL WHILST IN PLACE OF THE BBC1 CHANNEL, WAS DUTCH TV . ALSO RADIO CANNELS WERE ALSO HIT WITH MANY PEOPLE SAY THEIR RADIOS WERE RETUNING THEMSELVES TO FOREIGN STATIONS. APPARANTLET BANGER ADJUSTED HIS LARGE OUTDIDE ARIEL WHICH EXPERTS BELIEVE WAS THE PROBLRM. MEANWHILE ANDY MADE NO APOLOGIES AND SAID EVERYONE SHOULD GET S DECENT ARIEL......DEAR O DEAR O DEAR
Monday, 2 April 2012
UPDATE.........
BARNWELL IS ACCUSING ANDY OF GIVING WHITE VAN HIS MAN HIS NUMBER, AFTER RECIEVING A VOICEMAIL SAYING HE IS COMING TO THE STUDIO THIS SATURDAY TO ATTACK ANDY AGAIN, APPARANTLEY BARNWELL IS FURIOUS SAYING HE HAD NO RIGHT TO GIVE HIS NUMBER. MEANWHILE ANDY SAID TODAY HE HAS MR DERECKS NUMBER TOO AND SAID YOU WILL BE HEARING FROM MR STAINES.......
SPECIAL REPORT........STEVEN HALL
STEVEN FROM THE ANDY HOUR TELLS US THAT HIS MOLE REPORTS THAT BUNTY HAS PHONED THE MAYORS OFFICE TO SUGGEST PLANS TO USE HORSES AS BUSES TK CONBAT BOTH THE FUEL CRISIS AND AS A MORE ECONOMIC WAY OF TRAVELLING AROUND. WE CAN ALSO REPORT THSG BARNWELL RECIEVED A CALL FROM BUNTY TO GET HIM TO PHONE THEM AS THE MAYORS OFFICE WILL NOT TAKE HER CALLS SFTER THE OBSURD SUGGESTION.......THANKS STEVE
UPDATE........BANGERS DISCOS COMING TO A VENUE NEAR YOU
YES BANGER HAS ANNOUNCED HE IS GOING TO BE AVAILABLE FOR HIRE FOR DISCOS. BANGERS DISCOS WILL HE CLAIMS HAVE 2 TURNTABLES BUT IT'S UNDERSTOOD IT WILL BE TWO PEOPLE TURNING SOME ACTUAL FLOOR TABLES AND THE DISCO LIGHTS WILL BE A COUPLE OF PEOPLE TURNING ON AND OFF SOME COLOURED TORCHES. AND THE MUSIC HE SAYS WILL BE A GREAT SELECTION OF VICTORIAN CLASSICS FROM A WIND UP GRAMARPHONE......DEAR O DEAR
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